Dancing With Fruitcake

Category: The Blog

  • A Scam, Maybe?

    A person exercising on a fitness machine that allows for adjustable incline positions, demonstrating the 90-degree angle setting. The setting features two additional graphics displaying 60-degree and 30-degree angles for workout options. The background includes a well-lit room with windows and furniture.

    Remember the Aense Pro-Squatter I mentioned in my last post, My AquaFit Adventure (And Why I Ghosted the Pool)? That spiffy-looking piece of equipment popped up in my Facebook feed and seemed perfect for getting some low-impact exercise without destroying my arthritic knees.

    I got excited, placed the order, and waited… and waited… and waited some more.The payment cleared my bank in a day or two, but the package never shipped. I gave it extra time thinking it might be coming from overseas, but after weeks of silence I started digging. Turns out, plenty of other buyers had the exact same experience — paid and never received a thing. I emailed support. No response. Tried their chat bot, which asked me to pay $5 just to forward my message to the “right person.” Hard pass. A couple more emails later, their support links were disabled and the whole company seemed to have vanished. Classic scam.Thankfully, my bank took the claim seriously and issued a full refund right away.

    So instead, I went to Amazon and picked up the Sunny Health & Fitness Smart Heavy Duty Row-N-Ride Squat Assist Trainer.

    The Sunny Row-N-Ride arrived in a thousand pieces, but I was determined to put it together myself. Three hours later, just as I was about to attach the seat, I realized I had assembled the entire frame backwards. Oops.

    Thankfully, I found a 5-minute assembly video, made the corrections, and had it fully built in no time. By then I was already wiped out, but I climbed on anyway.

    First attempt? Just five repetitions. Not five minutes — five single reps. My body was like, “Nope, not today.” Before bed I pushed through 20 more, moving slowly and protecting my knees the whole time. When I woke up this morning… my knees actually felt stronger and hurt noticeably less. My thighs were a little sore (in that good way), so I hopped back on and knocked out 40 repetitions. Let me remind you — I’m 67 years old with arthritic knees. The fact that I could do this at all, and feel better afterward, is kind of amazing.The machine comes with a free app full of guided video workouts (Beginner, Intermediate, and Advanced) plus a community section where you can connect with other users.

    I’m genuinely impressed. This really is a full-body workout — my thighs and abs are already letting me know they’ve been worked!

    I’m starting with a goal of just five solid minutes, but I plan to build up to at least 30 minutes per session, three or more times a week. After the Aense Pro-Squatter scam, this Sunny Row-N-Ride from Amazon feels like a real win. Here’s the little beast all set up and ready for action:

    A rowing exercise machine positioned on a hardwood floor, featuring a seat, foot pedals, and ergonomic handlebars, with a cozy living room environment in the background.

    Anyone else using one of these? How’s your experience been? I’d love to hear your tips!

  • My AquaFit Adventure (And Why I Ghosted the Pool)

    A large group of elderly adults participating in a water aerobics class in a swimming pool, all smiling and waving at the camera.

    In my last post, I proudly declared I had become “one of those people” — the kind who actually goes to the gym and does AquaFit. Well… let me tell you how that worked out.

    For over four months, I showed up two to three times a week like a champ. And honestly? The results were fantastic. I lost weight faster than I expected, my knees hurt way less, my muscles felt toned, and I just generally had more pep in my step. I actually looked forward to it. Who was this person?!

    Then the universe decided to throw me a curveball.

    Two nearby gyms closed their pools for maintenance, and suddenly all those regulars flooded into our pool. Some days there were over 60 seniors packed in at once. The water looked like a crowded cruise ship pool on a hot day. That’s when I discovered something about myself:

    I might be a germaphobe.

    Twice I walked up to the edge and the water was milky. Not “slightly cloudy” — straight-up gross. I’m guessing it was a delightful cocktail of everyone’s lotion, sunscreen, deodorant, and who-knows-what-else. Another day there were mysterious little floaty things brushing against my legs. I nearly levitated out of the pool.

    After that, I couldn’t unsee (or unfeel) it. Every time I thought about getting in, my brain helpfully supplied images of 60+ seniors happily peeing in the water like it was their own private ocean. And that was it. I was done.

    Now just the thought of the pool makes my skin crawl. I’m genuinely disappointed in myself for not being able to push through it, because I really did love the workout. But here we are.

    So I’ve been hunting for a good full-body, low-impact option that won’t murder my knees. This little gadget popped up in my Facebook feed, and the ad promised it’s joint-friendly. I ordered it from Aense nine days ago… and it still hasn’t shipped. (I’m side-eyeing them pretty hard right now.)

    A woman exercising on an adjustable fitness machine in a bright room, demonstrating different angles of use.

    The Germ Lesson I Learned:

    I can live with my own mess. My house is far from spotless, and that’s fine — I just hire someone to help keep it civilized. But other people’s germs? Hard pass. Apparently I have very clear boundaries when it comes to shared bodily fluids in a giant public soup.

    Has anyone else had their fitness routine derailed by something like this? Or found a great knee-friendly workout they actually stuck with? I’d love to hear your suggestions while I wait for this mystery package to finally show up.

    Stay tuned — I’ll let you know how it goes!

  • One Year of Retirement

    A woman standing on a balcony overlooking a vineyard, holding a glass of white wine and smiling, with rolling hills and a serene river in the background.

    Today marks one full year of retirement — and I still can hardly believe it. The time has flown by in the most surprising way.

    When I first retired, I was carrying an extra 100 pounds and felt absolutely terrible. My knees hurt so badly that I dreaded getting out of my chair. Some mornings I could barely find the will to get out of bed. I felt old, worn down, and honestly wondered if my best days were behind me.The first few weeks were mostly about sleep — deep, restorative sleep I hadn’t realized I so desperately needed.

    Once I was rested, I started making small but consistent changes: eating better, moving more gently, and showing up for AquaFit classes at the pool. I’ve now lost 50 pounds. My knees still get stiff and sore sometimes, but I’m moving so much better than before. I go to the gym pool three times a week and to a painting class once a week. Since I started eating more fermented foods, my mind feels clearer and I’m genuinely happier most days.

    I also challenged myself by taking a genealogy course at Boston University. It wasn’t the smoothest experience, but I did learn a lot — enough to trace one family line all the way back to the 1200s. Now I’m excited to keep filling in the details and stories.

    I’ve been enjoying a subscription to Texas Monthly. The writing is excellent (which is rarer than it should be these days), the reporting is deep and thoughtful, and I especially look forward to their true crime pieces.

    I’ll admit there are still occasional moments when I feel a little bored, but they pass. What I don’t feel is any regret about leaving work behind. Retirement, even with its quiet rhythms, has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I’m healthier, lighter, more curious, and finally getting to live life on my own terms.Here’s to year two.

  • Fermented Foods

    A plate of various side dishes including kimchi, pickled cabbage, green olives in a small bowl, pickles, and a slice of bread, accompanied by a dollop of sour cream.

    Recently, I read an article about what Robert F. Kennedy Jr. eats in a typical day. He looks great, and I want to look great too. The main things that stood out were steak, plenty of fermented foods, and the fact that he sometimes eats just one meal. I’m definitely not a one-meal-a-day person, but the fermented foods part intrigued me enough to give it a try.

    I ordered a 6-pack variety mix from Olive My Pickle that included dill pickles, garlic dill pickles, butter olives, mixed Mediterranean olives, carrot and dill sauerkraut, and kimchi. I’ll admit I was a bit skeptical at first — fermented foods contain live bacteria, and I’ve always been used to the standard vinegar pickles you find in most stores.

    My first bite was the butter olives, and they were absolutely delicious. That quickly led to trying the garlic dill pickles, which tasted just like the pickles I remembered from the 1960s. It made me realize how flat and one-dimensional today’s vinegar pickles have become. I saved the kimchi for last because I’d never tried it before and have sometimes been underwhelmed by certain international foods. Once everything else was gone, I finally gave it a chance — and to my surprise, it was genuinely delicious. I ended up ordering another 6-pack right away.

    After that, I dove into the research on fermented foods and was impressed by the potential benefits. For the past three to four weeks, I’ve been eating 4–6 servings a day. Almost immediately, I noticed I felt more awake and alert — which is a big deal for someone who’s usually pretty lazy by nature. I’m still hoping the anti-inflammatory effects will eventually help with my achy knees, but I know that kind of improvement can take time, so I’m being patient.

    Here’s a typical day of eating for me now:

    Breakfast:
    Two slices of toasted sourdough bread, three eggs, and about ¼ cup of sauerkraut.

    Lunch:
    Greek yogurt

    Dinner:
    Chicken thighs (or sometimes tuna, burger, or salmon), a vegetable side, and two more slices of toasted sourdough.

    Snacks:
    A pickle or a few olives throughout the day.

    I’ve been able to hit my six servings of fermented foods daily while still staying within a reasonable salt range. So far, I’ve lost 45 pounds eating this way (over a year) and I genuinely feel much better overall. I’ve also been minimizing processed foods as much as possible — especially after learning about things like arsenic in chocolate and how many store-bought products seem designed to work against us.

    If you’re even a little curious, I highly recommend giving real fermented foods a try. Just be sure to check the label — look for “fermented” or “live cultures,” not just “pickled.”

    Happy eating!